I will admit, these are not really habits, more like practices or qualities, perhaps they are virtues of orgasmic women. For the ladies, ask yourself, "Do I personify these qualities and what can I do to put into practice these virtues and ideas?" and men (or lesbians) may ask themselves "Does my girlfriend show in how she thinks and acts to be a highly orgasmic woman? How can I send her this message and get her to admit she may need to pay attention to this part of her life instead of putting all the pressure of her sexual satisfaction on me?"
1) No Shame
A highly orgasmic woman loves her body. She considers applying lotion to her dry winter skin as a moment for self massage that...may lead to more, if she plays her cards right. She loves her body and minimizes it's flaws in her own psyche. That's not a beer belly, thats a pillow for a lover. Her tits don't sag, they lovingly rest against said pillow....because who wouldn't want to slide up against her. Plus, when pumped up in a beautiful bra, those ladies deliver cleavage that stops traffic!
2) Know Your Body
A highly orgasmic woman knows her body. She knows the relative depth of her vagina. She knows what angles work for her and which parts like the most internal rubbing. She is aware of and accepts the orgasmic amplifcation ability of the anus. She knows what she likes, and how to get it.
3) Practice Sex Whenever
A highly orgasmic woman has the emotional flexibility to change her mood in order to get over a trivial matter and get it on. She serves shit up cold after she gets off and her man is more willing to see her side of the story. She understands the power of pacification and also doesn't deny her own pleasure to prove a point. Plus, she digs sex and makes it a priority.
4) Sexual Attitude
A highly orgasmic woman is in touch with her sexual attitude and has a personal, emotional, logical, and rational opinion and position on sexual matters affecting her and the world. She thinks about these issues and on a daily or weekly or periodic basis comes to startling and unique revelations about sex and the world because it is on her mind.
5) Imagination and Fantasy
A highly orgasmic woman has the ability to imagine and develop fantasies about sex. She knows this helps arouse her and that telling these fantastic stories to her mate may arouse them also. A highly orgasmic woman has a current "go to" fantasy for her masturbation sessions and one she can whip out for her partner that involves them and perhaps a friend of his/her choosing.
6) Unguarded and Open
A highly orgasmic woman has few filters. She speaks her mind. She gives instructions in the sack. She suggests positions. She adjusts her level of filthy discussion to the proper audience, but she unleashes when it is appropriate. (or inappropriate, she doesn't care, sometimes).
7) Discipline
A highly orgasmic woman has the self discipline to practice every day. Masturbation is practice for a highly orgasmic woman so that her partner can experience the full ability of her body, and get off to the highest level themselves. Just because you have arm muscles doesn't mean you can lift a 100 pound barbell and hold it over you head the first time you try. You need to practice by lifting a little more weight everyday. So, your vagina cannot be expected to do what any other muscle group cannot do. Practice your Kegel exercises and masturbate in anticipation of the next time you have sex with another person and you will be amazed at the results.
Remember, the sexier you feel, the more sex you will want from yourself. The more you do it with yourself, the more comfortable you will be doing it with someone else. The more comfortable you are doing it with someone else, the more you will enjoy sex. The more you enjoy sex, the more you are apt to do it. The more you do it, the better you feel, so have some sex after every meal! And, you never know, if everybody is getting laid, perhaps it can lead to world peace!
Thursday, October 16, 2008
Friday, September 19, 2008
Noisy, Screaming, Grunting Sex
Have you ever heard these unwelcome words? "Shhhh. You have to be quiet, we can't wake up my..." room mate, parents, the kids, the guests, the neighbors....whomever will be disturbed by the humping noises emanating from the two-headed beast.
I have always found that -although in the beginning it seems hot- my orgasm is thwarted by stifling my vocalizations during screwing. I'm not necessarily a "screamer" although I have been brought to the brink, but I am a noise maker. I grunt, squeal, breathe heavy, pant, moan, weep, talk, hold my breath, give directions, propose positions, cry out to god, jesus, joseph and mary- the whole holy family gets invited to join in on the good times and get to hear my thanks!
I have had to put a sock in it, literally. Bury my head in the pillows, clamp my mouth on a shoulder (but that leads to embarrassing fart like noises when I start to breath heavily). I'll even groan appreciatively with a dick in my mouth, so while that lowers the volume, it's no solution.
Why is it, I wonder, that noise or words have such an effect on the outcome of the sexual experience? A friend told me she unexpectedly orgasmed during sex when her lover first expressed his devotion. The "I love you" phrase whispered in her ear during sex was what did it for her.
A foreign accent can also make me immediately wet and swollen. The tone of a husky voice, a hushed whisper. They are all such turn ons! I once had a boyfriend who would say my name over and over again during sex, then later in the day or night when he would mention my name, on the phone, to a friend when introducing me, even asking what I wanted to order at a restaurant, I would get so hot because it would bring me back to that moment.
I have always found that -although in the beginning it seems hot- my orgasm is thwarted by stifling my vocalizations during screwing. I'm not necessarily a "screamer" although I have been brought to the brink, but I am a noise maker. I grunt, squeal, breathe heavy, pant, moan, weep, talk, hold my breath, give directions, propose positions, cry out to god, jesus, joseph and mary- the whole holy family gets invited to join in on the good times and get to hear my thanks!
I have had to put a sock in it, literally. Bury my head in the pillows, clamp my mouth on a shoulder (but that leads to embarrassing fart like noises when I start to breath heavily). I'll even groan appreciatively with a dick in my mouth, so while that lowers the volume, it's no solution.
Why is it, I wonder, that noise or words have such an effect on the outcome of the sexual experience? A friend told me she unexpectedly orgasmed during sex when her lover first expressed his devotion. The "I love you" phrase whispered in her ear during sex was what did it for her.
A foreign accent can also make me immediately wet and swollen. The tone of a husky voice, a hushed whisper. They are all such turn ons! I once had a boyfriend who would say my name over and over again during sex, then later in the day or night when he would mention my name, on the phone, to a friend when introducing me, even asking what I wanted to order at a restaurant, I would get so hot because it would bring me back to that moment.
I think any kind of inhibition -including a mute button- limits the bodies ability to orgasm. If you are ashamed of part of your body, or hyper conscious of a perceived fault, or trying to be quiet, it can prevent that wonderful moment.
Martin Portner wrote in an article for Scientific American in their May 2008 issue:
Martin Portner wrote in an article for Scientific American in their May 2008 issue:
...when a woman reached orgasm, something unexpected happened: much of her brain went silent. Some of the most muted neurons sat in the left lateral orbitofrontal cortex, which may govern self-control over basic desires such as sex. Decreased activity there, the researchers suggest, might correspond to a release of tension and inhibition. The scientists also saw a dip in excitation in the dorsomedial prefrontal cortex, which has an apparent role in moral reasoning and social judgment—a change that may be tied to a suspension of judgment and reflection.
Brain activity fell in the amygdala, too, suggesting a depression of vigilance similar to that seen in men, who generally showed far less deactivation in their brain during orgasm than their female counterparts did.
“Fear and anxiety need to be avoided at all costs if a woman wishes to have an orgasm; we knew that, but now we can see it happening in the depths of the brain,” Holstege says. He went so far as to declare at the 2005 meeting of the European Society for Human Reproduction and Development: “At the moment of orgasm, women do not have any emotional feelings.”
Really, you can't be thinking of anything; fears, anxieties, your fat thighs, or anybody listening and probably at the moment that you are coming, you aren't making a sound. So shhhhh....Brain activity fell in the amygdala, too, suggesting a depression of vigilance similar to that seen in men, who generally showed far less deactivation in their brain during orgasm than their female counterparts did.
“Fear and anxiety need to be avoided at all costs if a woman wishes to have an orgasm; we knew that, but now we can see it happening in the depths of the brain,” Holstege says. He went so far as to declare at the 2005 meeting of the European Society for Human Reproduction and Development: “At the moment of orgasm, women do not have any emotional feelings.”
Friday, September 5, 2008
Ahhhh I love the Wood.
I am starting to think about wood. Size, sensitivity, hardness, age, refractory periods, holding back orgasm, spilling the seed, obesity, medications, all things related to wood. The amazing staff of life, (sorry bread, but woman cannot live on you alone) it's many shapes and sizes. The curves that scratch the insatiable itch.
Size: Does it matter? a big Yes is probably the most honest answer, but having a small dick doesn't inhibit orgasm for your partner. The size and quality of your self esteem has a bigger effect than your dick size. I have found that smaller dicks are more sensitive (see sensitivity below) -and they are easier to blow. Smaller dicks fit perfectly in your mouth and don't take hours to reach orgasm. They don't hurt your jaw muscles after hours of sucking. They still rub you raw after hours of fucking, and are far more comfortable when shoved up the asshole. So there, big cocked guys, the little masters of the less endowed enjoy pleasures you may never know.
Sensitivity: It stands to reason that smaller dicks are more sensitive. The same number of nerve endings, on average, because every human is different, are spread across the area space of the flesh of the cock. I knew a guy with a super huge dick -didn't know him in the biblical sense- that would complain to me how long it took him to come because he was not that sensitive. This sensitivity could also a bad thing for that smaller cocked man. If it takes the woman they are screwing a long time to come, and if their dick is very sensitive, perhaps they cannot hold out long enough, and might come before she does leading to some level of disappointment.
This leads us to...
Hardness: I have found that the more a man is physically active on a regular basis, following a physical practice that is demanding -yoga, martial arts, basketball, running, cycling, hockey, weight lifting- the harder his dick becomes. I think this can be attributed to the presence of male hormones that are activated by the stress placed on the body. Testosterone is being released in a timely, predictable manner. And I think these physical activities assist in maintaining circulation of the blood which in turn increases the amount of blood able to flow into the cock. Whatever the physical reason, there is nothing better than a hard cock no matter what size.
Age: Well, it happens to us all if we are lucky enough to live a long time. Age and the depletion of the production of hormones allows for a softer dick that may not experience orgasm every time it fucks. This is okay for the ladies, just an ironic role reversal. Now we want it every night, and our men are nervous and embarrassed about their ability to perform -will I get hard, will it stay, how will it feel, will I be able to do it again if I don't satisfy her the first time?
Wait a minute...we're about to address the...
Refractory period: is way, way longer now if you do get off. So, you won't be able to fuck again for a while if you do give into the big release. Age and hormones really affect this ability, this feeling that you could go again and again, the feeling that you thought would never leave, has now left with the glow of youth.
Holding Back Orgasm: This taoist practice is said to decrease the refractory period, increase the sensation of orgasm, steal the energy of the woman you are with and deliver her youth and vitality-her "jing"- to you (but only if she orgasms, of course, there is always a catch). This practice claims to build the energy that might otherwise be lost and contain it in the body and mind allowing a man to focus on complicated tasks or to reach levels of enlightenment that might not otherwise be possible in a human that is dissipating this orgasmic energy at every opportunity. Some can do this after much practice using the Kegel muscles to contract at the point of orgasm, some simply apply pressure to the "taint"at that special moment thus stopping the flow of juicy goo and absorbing that goodness again and again.
Spilling the seed: Nothing like a final release, right? Especially after a nice cheap massage. Premature ejaculation is another issue. You need a very patient woman and practice, practice, practice to build stamina and resistance to coming. Plus, during the training time -cue Rocky movie theme music, da na nah, da na naah- the premature quick-draw-McGraw must have other skills to rely on so that this mate is motivated to help him and not a frustrated mess. (see fingerblasting post and cunnilingus post for some tips)
Obesity: Lose 20 pounds, gain an inch of cock length, I've been told. I think this works for two reasons. First, an optical illusion; remove flab around your midsection and all of a sudden that inch that has been tucked away is exposed. Second, now that you are skinnier, you can shove yourself -even your whole body- closer to your lady without "carmichael-ing" her and give her a little more wood than your fatter alter ego could deliver. Thirdly, if you are losing weight, chances are you are exercising and eating right -see hardness entry above- increasing the amount of blood that can flow into the cock.
Medications: Ahh... the dreaded medically enforced erectile dysfunction. It's better than being dead, right? Listen guys, now is the time, and might I add it is never too late, to work on your fingerblasting techniques and cunnilingus expertise. Your cock will not always be there to rely on, you must diversify your assets to make yourself a good sexual investment. Your hands though, will always be hard, and your mouth will always be suckibly soft. A nice balance and two of the best substitutes for the beautiful contradic(k)tory soft-to-the-touch and hard-for-the-plunge dick. Then there is the other side of the medication coin. Instead of prescriptions that keep someone healthy but lead to a soft dick, the viagra pill, which I have no experience with yet but I am sure in the future I will know the power and benefits of this little magic pill, give the otherwise wood challenged a stiff knob. What fun! Is it? I've heard of marathon sessions, rubbed raw cocks and crotches, trips to the emergency room, hooker's charging by the hour...Does anyone have any anecdotes related to this experience they want to share?
Curves: When I was in college, my room mate's boyfriend's nickname was "J" for the way his dick turned when erect. This name was given to him by his friends, not his girlfriend. I often wondered, how did they know which way his erect dick meandered? Boys, do tell, do you catch a gander at all your friends wood? My room mate loved it. Especially, she said, when they did it "crosswise" you know, the position where she was laying on her back, and he on his side, so his dick rubbed her g spot perfectly. Or she'd spin perpendicular (no pun intended) on top to get the right angle, her shoulder and the side of her body facing his front. Some guys are lucky to have their dick curve up -making missionary a perfecto position- and some dicks curve down, making, you guessed it, doggie style the preferred position for ultimate vaginal stimulation. Have no fear, if your dick is straight and true, you are best fitted for all positions -anal too- you just have to work out a little extra aiming, moving your whole body to get at a certain zone. Just pick a position, point and go.
If you're looking for me, I'll be camping in the woods...
Size: Does it matter? a big Yes is probably the most honest answer, but having a small dick doesn't inhibit orgasm for your partner. The size and quality of your self esteem has a bigger effect than your dick size. I have found that smaller dicks are more sensitive (see sensitivity below) -and they are easier to blow. Smaller dicks fit perfectly in your mouth and don't take hours to reach orgasm. They don't hurt your jaw muscles after hours of sucking. They still rub you raw after hours of fucking, and are far more comfortable when shoved up the asshole. So there, big cocked guys, the little masters of the less endowed enjoy pleasures you may never know.
Sensitivity: It stands to reason that smaller dicks are more sensitive. The same number of nerve endings, on average, because every human is different, are spread across the area space of the flesh of the cock. I knew a guy with a super huge dick -didn't know him in the biblical sense- that would complain to me how long it took him to come because he was not that sensitive. This sensitivity could also a bad thing for that smaller cocked man. If it takes the woman they are screwing a long time to come, and if their dick is very sensitive, perhaps they cannot hold out long enough, and might come before she does leading to some level of disappointment.
This leads us to...
Hardness: I have found that the more a man is physically active on a regular basis, following a physical practice that is demanding -yoga, martial arts, basketball, running, cycling, hockey, weight lifting- the harder his dick becomes. I think this can be attributed to the presence of male hormones that are activated by the stress placed on the body. Testosterone is being released in a timely, predictable manner. And I think these physical activities assist in maintaining circulation of the blood which in turn increases the amount of blood able to flow into the cock. Whatever the physical reason, there is nothing better than a hard cock no matter what size.
Age: Well, it happens to us all if we are lucky enough to live a long time. Age and the depletion of the production of hormones allows for a softer dick that may not experience orgasm every time it fucks. This is okay for the ladies, just an ironic role reversal. Now we want it every night, and our men are nervous and embarrassed about their ability to perform -will I get hard, will it stay, how will it feel, will I be able to do it again if I don't satisfy her the first time?
Wait a minute...we're about to address the...
Refractory period: is way, way longer now if you do get off. So, you won't be able to fuck again for a while if you do give into the big release. Age and hormones really affect this ability, this feeling that you could go again and again, the feeling that you thought would never leave, has now left with the glow of youth.
Holding Back Orgasm: This taoist practice is said to decrease the refractory period, increase the sensation of orgasm, steal the energy of the woman you are with and deliver her youth and vitality-her "jing"- to you (but only if she orgasms, of course, there is always a catch). This practice claims to build the energy that might otherwise be lost and contain it in the body and mind allowing a man to focus on complicated tasks or to reach levels of enlightenment that might not otherwise be possible in a human that is dissipating this orgasmic energy at every opportunity. Some can do this after much practice using the Kegel muscles to contract at the point of orgasm, some simply apply pressure to the "taint"at that special moment thus stopping the flow of juicy goo and absorbing that goodness again and again.
Spilling the seed: Nothing like a final release, right? Especially after a nice cheap massage. Premature ejaculation is another issue. You need a very patient woman and practice, practice, practice to build stamina and resistance to coming. Plus, during the training time -cue Rocky movie theme music, da na nah, da na naah- the premature quick-draw-McGraw must have other skills to rely on so that this mate is motivated to help him and not a frustrated mess. (see fingerblasting post and cunnilingus post for some tips)
Obesity: Lose 20 pounds, gain an inch of cock length, I've been told. I think this works for two reasons. First, an optical illusion; remove flab around your midsection and all of a sudden that inch that has been tucked away is exposed. Second, now that you are skinnier, you can shove yourself -even your whole body- closer to your lady without "carmichael-ing" her and give her a little more wood than your fatter alter ego could deliver. Thirdly, if you are losing weight, chances are you are exercising and eating right -see hardness entry above- increasing the amount of blood that can flow into the cock.
Medications: Ahh... the dreaded medically enforced erectile dysfunction. It's better than being dead, right? Listen guys, now is the time, and might I add it is never too late, to work on your fingerblasting techniques and cunnilingus expertise. Your cock will not always be there to rely on, you must diversify your assets to make yourself a good sexual investment. Your hands though, will always be hard, and your mouth will always be suckibly soft. A nice balance and two of the best substitutes for the beautiful contradic(k)tory soft-to-the-touch and hard-for-the-plunge dick. Then there is the other side of the medication coin. Instead of prescriptions that keep someone healthy but lead to a soft dick, the viagra pill, which I have no experience with yet but I am sure in the future I will know the power and benefits of this little magic pill, give the otherwise wood challenged a stiff knob. What fun! Is it? I've heard of marathon sessions, rubbed raw cocks and crotches, trips to the emergency room, hooker's charging by the hour...Does anyone have any anecdotes related to this experience they want to share?
Curves: When I was in college, my room mate's boyfriend's nickname was "J" for the way his dick turned when erect. This name was given to him by his friends, not his girlfriend. I often wondered, how did they know which way his erect dick meandered? Boys, do tell, do you catch a gander at all your friends wood? My room mate loved it. Especially, she said, when they did it "crosswise" you know, the position where she was laying on her back, and he on his side, so his dick rubbed her g spot perfectly. Or she'd spin perpendicular (no pun intended) on top to get the right angle, her shoulder and the side of her body facing his front. Some guys are lucky to have their dick curve up -making missionary a perfecto position- and some dicks curve down, making, you guessed it, doggie style the preferred position for ultimate vaginal stimulation. Have no fear, if your dick is straight and true, you are best fitted for all positions -anal too- you just have to work out a little extra aiming, moving your whole body to get at a certain zone. Just pick a position, point and go.
If you're looking for me, I'll be camping in the woods...
Monday, August 18, 2008
Bringing Back the Vulva
I started to really think about the vulva because my sister taught her daughter to refer to her genitals as her vulva. I was a little horrified at this at first. I thought, she'll be laughed out of the locker room when she starts referring to her genitals as a vulva when all the other girls will surely call it their vagina (or pussy, twat, cunt, whatever). My sister defended the vulva though, saying that is the visible part of the situation, from the outside you don't even see the vagina, so why refer to the vulva as a vagina? This got me to thinking, yeah, why not the vulva? It's where the clit lives, it's where the lips are loving life, it's the part you most frequently clean for proper vulva health and happiness. It's the appetizer-that could also work as an entree- on the cunnilingus menu. It's the most noted camel toe.
Did you ever notice how people's genitals are mirrored by the features on their face? I think I can tell exactly how someone's genitals look by the way their eyes, nose and mouth are situated, and the size of such features. The face is the reflection of the vulva (and equally, the penis). I think we are unconsciously aware of this when we think a person is attractive to us, we are also checking out their reproductive parts, but it doesn't register consciously.
Another reason to refer to the downtown lady as a vulva is that the word vagina means scabbard. A place to slide your sword. According to Wikipedia, the word vulva was taken from volva or vulva which means "womb, female genitals", probably from the Latin volvere "to roll" or "wrapper". Is this simply the same concept, a "wrapper" for your sword, like a scabbard? Or all the goodies are "rolled" in this vulva?
Possibly vulva, or the jelly roll, is a reference to rock and roll, which I believe is a description of screwing, girl on top style. Rocking is the back and forth, pelvic tilt created with abdominal muscles pulling up and in and tipping down and back. Rolling is the circular action, swirling your hips on top on the cock, 360 degrees, like hula hooping an invisible hoop. Get it? This "rocking and rolling" action was thought to create a "reeling" in the receiver (and I'll tell ya, the giver gets something out of it too!) Such action really stimulates the vulva.
Sheath that sword. Rock and roll will never die. Long live the vulva.
Did you ever notice how people's genitals are mirrored by the features on their face? I think I can tell exactly how someone's genitals look by the way their eyes, nose and mouth are situated, and the size of such features. The face is the reflection of the vulva (and equally, the penis). I think we are unconsciously aware of this when we think a person is attractive to us, we are also checking out their reproductive parts, but it doesn't register consciously.
Another reason to refer to the downtown lady as a vulva is that the word vagina means scabbard. A place to slide your sword. According to Wikipedia, the word vulva was taken from volva or vulva which means "womb, female genitals", probably from the Latin volvere "to roll" or "wrapper". Is this simply the same concept, a "wrapper" for your sword, like a scabbard? Or all the goodies are "rolled" in this vulva?
Possibly vulva, or the jelly roll, is a reference to rock and roll, which I believe is a description of screwing, girl on top style. Rocking is the back and forth, pelvic tilt created with abdominal muscles pulling up and in and tipping down and back. Rolling is the circular action, swirling your hips on top on the cock, 360 degrees, like hula hooping an invisible hoop. Get it? This "rocking and rolling" action was thought to create a "reeling" in the receiver (and I'll tell ya, the giver gets something out of it too!) Such action really stimulates the vulva.
Sheath that sword. Rock and roll will never die. Long live the vulva.
Saturday, August 9, 2008
Bust that cherry!
Everybody remembers their first time. Usually vividly. Intercourse ..ooooooh. So grown up. But what were your requirements? Some women set it up or wait for what they think is the perfect moment, prom night in a nice hotel with their first loves or the equivalent. Does that put too much pressure on the moment to deliver beyond what it really is? Yes, I understand the intimacy involved in the act of lovemaking, he sticks something of him inside of you (like Adam says... uhhh, it's only my rib Eve...relax...I won't tell anybody). It's a moment imbued with trust, for sure. For some, it just comes down to that decisive moment when they think they are being left behind by sexually active friends, or for others like me, the day they are drunk enough not to care, the "get it over with" attitude (one 40 ounce Bud was all it took, ahhh, youth).
For most women I have talked to, whatever road they took to get to hymen-free living, the thoughts after the act were...huh? that's it? We are told to expect big things from this moment, BLOOD! Tears of JOY. LIFelong LOVE! Immediate PRegnancy! The Pain of HELL. No one mentions the oozing sperm that will eventually soak your little undies and leave you feeling all day like your twat sneezed. Or the uncomfortable and awkward moments between even the best of friends and longest term boy/girlfriends after that certain edge has been gleaned. That intimate knowledge learned. Someone got something and someone relented and the power struggle begins.
Most women did not orgasm that first time, and even for years after they started having sex - this may be changing with the proliferation of sex toys, and ease of acquiring them over the internet- thank you internet!!!! So what was driving them to fuck if they weren't even getting off? The satisfaction of getting off their guy? Yes, that's a part of it. The feeling of appreciation from that guy? Now were getting warmer. The feeling of being loved and the affection that accompanies the act of lovemaking? Perhaps. Or is it the new found power that the woman now has over her pussy whipped boyfriend? So in giving it up, does she gain an advantage?
Some -like me- kept at it for practice. I knew that first time couldn't be IT, there had to be MORE. I thought, like a muscle, if I used it, it would grow. If I got used to it, something, that thing, would eventually happen.
I found that this attitude scared men. I wasn't in it for the babies, the relationship, the power, the commitment, I wanted to practice and get good at it. I was in it for the pleasure. That is intimidating to a guy who now has a much bigger responsibility -in his mind- to get me off. If it is all about the sexual act, and those moments only, they couldn't make it up to me later with a nice dinner, or any other scenarios that assuaged the other ladies. I suppose in looking back I was a pretty harsh judge, they were only learning as I was, but why did they talk such a huge game if they couldn't deliver?
Peacocking, bravado, a facet of the mating dance. In any case I did give them their chance to prove it. Little did I know that my orgasmic sexual satisfaction was up to me all along (can you hear me clicking my ruby red shoes together, "there's nothing like masturbation, nothing like masturbation"). And now all that masturbation has really paid off in sexual satisfaction with another human. Coming is exponential.
So basically, the boys had years of masturbation under their belts, and the girls were starting from scratch. Hopefully, the future holds more masturbating girls starting younger in life, who will reap those benefits and will enjoy sex more when the time comes to bust that cherry.
One last thought, do the women who plan the perfect de-virginalization night also become bridezillas?
For most women I have talked to, whatever road they took to get to hymen-free living, the thoughts after the act were...huh? that's it? We are told to expect big things from this moment, BLOOD! Tears of JOY. LIFelong LOVE! Immediate PRegnancy! The Pain of HELL. No one mentions the oozing sperm that will eventually soak your little undies and leave you feeling all day like your twat sneezed. Or the uncomfortable and awkward moments between even the best of friends and longest term boy/girlfriends after that certain edge has been gleaned. That intimate knowledge learned. Someone got something and someone relented and the power struggle begins.
Most women did not orgasm that first time, and even for years after they started having sex - this may be changing with the proliferation of sex toys, and ease of acquiring them over the internet- thank you internet!!!! So what was driving them to fuck if they weren't even getting off? The satisfaction of getting off their guy? Yes, that's a part of it. The feeling of appreciation from that guy? Now were getting warmer. The feeling of being loved and the affection that accompanies the act of lovemaking? Perhaps. Or is it the new found power that the woman now has over her pussy whipped boyfriend? So in giving it up, does she gain an advantage?
Some -like me- kept at it for practice. I knew that first time couldn't be IT, there had to be MORE. I thought, like a muscle, if I used it, it would grow. If I got used to it, something, that thing, would eventually happen.
I found that this attitude scared men. I wasn't in it for the babies, the relationship, the power, the commitment, I wanted to practice and get good at it. I was in it for the pleasure. That is intimidating to a guy who now has a much bigger responsibility -in his mind- to get me off. If it is all about the sexual act, and those moments only, they couldn't make it up to me later with a nice dinner, or any other scenarios that assuaged the other ladies. I suppose in looking back I was a pretty harsh judge, they were only learning as I was, but why did they talk such a huge game if they couldn't deliver?
Peacocking, bravado, a facet of the mating dance. In any case I did give them their chance to prove it. Little did I know that my orgasmic sexual satisfaction was up to me all along (can you hear me clicking my ruby red shoes together, "there's nothing like masturbation, nothing like masturbation"). And now all that masturbation has really paid off in sexual satisfaction with another human. Coming is exponential.
So basically, the boys had years of masturbation under their belts, and the girls were starting from scratch. Hopefully, the future holds more masturbating girls starting younger in life, who will reap those benefits and will enjoy sex more when the time comes to bust that cherry.
One last thought, do the women who plan the perfect de-virginalization night also become bridezillas?
Sunday, July 20, 2008
A Vicious Cycle: Women's horniness killed by asshole behavior.
Guys wonder why they do not get enough sex in a relationship. The reason? Women are cut off at the pass by asshole behavior from their man. Women get cranky and need to be fucked, sometimes they don't even know how bad they need it, or as much or as often as they do. Woman are at their horniest and are maybe acting a little crazy from being pent up, a side effect of our busy lives of thinking about others, but right when we need it most, usually our guys do something that makes us so mad, that we don't want to fuck them at all! What an asshole! And nobody can work up the energy to fuck an asshole (and get off).
Is this an unconscious way that men withhold sex from their women? They complain that women don't want sex as often as men do, but that is just not true, women just can't suck and fuck someone they are mad at. Perhaps the nature of the standard act of intercourse allows men to fuck even if they hold a grudge. Who wouldn't want to pound on someone you were mad at? (and get off in the process, great!) But for women, getting fucked after you feel fucked over emotionally just... is not acceptable, literally.
Here's the advice, if your woman is acting cranky, and you know she needs it, instead of the lecture that your not getting enough downtown action, or grabbing her and humping her while she picks up the dirty laundry you left on the floor last week, or humping her during any other chore that is demanding her time at that moment, or yaking that your needs are not being met, (insert any other whiny, whiny man complaints about their sex life here) or even telling her she "just needs to be fucked" which is like saying "are you gonna go on the rag soon, you're a bitch!?" INSTEAD, think of the ways you can arouse her. Take a shower, maybe you can entice her into taking one with you by saying how you would love to scrub her (all over, not just her titties) with luscious soaps, or shampoo her hair as she relaxes, or whatever it takes to get her into the shower with you, dry her off, dry yourself off, and then do all the things you have been dreaming of. If you can't get her in the shower with you, take one by yourself, meet her with a clean body and start being very nice to her, arouse her, then she will be more than happy to fuck you. Buy some nice smelling lotion and massage her whole body. You may have to do this a few times without expecting sex after. This will lure her into relaxing and eventually, maybe the second or third time you are massaging her, she will fuck your brains out.
Did you notice the "arouse her" message? This is a major missing link for men. Women are focused on and distracted by the things they have to do in life -especially if they have kids, they are always thinking of what they have to do for the kids- and cannot just switch into fuck-me mode unless aroused (or driven into fuck-me mode by time and pent up sex drive energy that has not been released -see above- but by that time she is already very crazy!). Sometimes, you can't just lift her skirt and start chomping, she may need a little more warm up, BUT sometimes that's ALL it takes, a random act of cunnilingus and a nice finger-blasting that does not need to be immediately reciprocated with a blow job does wonders for a girl's heart and mind.
You won't even have to think about arousing her so much if you are not an asshole! She will be more apt and ready to screw you if you are doing things that make you appear to be a good guy in her eyes. Remember, sex is habitual, the more they do it, the more regularly women will want to do it. Think about it. They need it as much as you. They want it as much as you. They also want you to be fuckable. So, be a good guy, and she will screw you more often.
Is this an unconscious way that men withhold sex from their women? They complain that women don't want sex as often as men do, but that is just not true, women just can't suck and fuck someone they are mad at. Perhaps the nature of the standard act of intercourse allows men to fuck even if they hold a grudge. Who wouldn't want to pound on someone you were mad at? (and get off in the process, great!) But for women, getting fucked after you feel fucked over emotionally just... is not acceptable, literally.
Here's the advice, if your woman is acting cranky, and you know she needs it, instead of the lecture that your not getting enough downtown action, or grabbing her and humping her while she picks up the dirty laundry you left on the floor last week, or humping her during any other chore that is demanding her time at that moment, or yaking that your needs are not being met, (insert any other whiny, whiny man complaints about their sex life here) or even telling her she "just needs to be fucked" which is like saying "are you gonna go on the rag soon, you're a bitch!?" INSTEAD, think of the ways you can arouse her. Take a shower, maybe you can entice her into taking one with you by saying how you would love to scrub her (all over, not just her titties) with luscious soaps, or shampoo her hair as she relaxes, or whatever it takes to get her into the shower with you, dry her off, dry yourself off, and then do all the things you have been dreaming of. If you can't get her in the shower with you, take one by yourself, meet her with a clean body and start being very nice to her, arouse her, then she will be more than happy to fuck you. Buy some nice smelling lotion and massage her whole body. You may have to do this a few times without expecting sex after. This will lure her into relaxing and eventually, maybe the second or third time you are massaging her, she will fuck your brains out.
Did you notice the "arouse her" message? This is a major missing link for men. Women are focused on and distracted by the things they have to do in life -especially if they have kids, they are always thinking of what they have to do for the kids- and cannot just switch into fuck-me mode unless aroused (or driven into fuck-me mode by time and pent up sex drive energy that has not been released -see above- but by that time she is already very crazy!). Sometimes, you can't just lift her skirt and start chomping, she may need a little more warm up, BUT sometimes that's ALL it takes, a random act of cunnilingus and a nice finger-blasting that does not need to be immediately reciprocated with a blow job does wonders for a girl's heart and mind.
You won't even have to think about arousing her so much if you are not an asshole! She will be more apt and ready to screw you if you are doing things that make you appear to be a good guy in her eyes. Remember, sex is habitual, the more they do it, the more regularly women will want to do it. Think about it. They need it as much as you. They want it as much as you. They also want you to be fuckable. So, be a good guy, and she will screw you more often.
Friday, July 18, 2008
Jane'e Guide review of Smutty Intelligence
I've been given a "quality" rating from Jane's Guide and I didn't even sleep with anybody!
I had a lot of fun reading Karen's blog. It is a wonderful collection of insights into sexuality written by a confident woman over thirty. Here is one of my favorite quotes from her work, "Well, some ladies are a little shy about 'masturbating' themselves in front of a new guy. I might be a little harsh but I think this kind of shy is ridiculous. Ladies, you are letting them stick their penis in you but are too shy to get yourself off in the process? Shy and demure behavior is not for the bedroom, it's for when you meet his parents, or children, or boss." I could not have said it better myself. Karen has a wonderfully brazen tone throughout her writing, and I love it. - Vamp
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