Sunday, January 18, 2009

Until Death or until us Particles Part

In a recent article in the New York Times, John Tierney writes about the findings of Dr. Young who studies the power of ocytocin and vassopressin, two hormones that are said to increase feelings of trust and bonding in female and male prairie vole's. Those with low levels of these hormones, or blocked capacity, are less likely to bond with mates.

There are numerous studies about the biophysical neurological peptides and hormones that guide and sustain the feelings of love. But what triggers the release of this cocktail of hormones? The body's reaction to another person, right? Well, what is reacting?

I think it is all about particle physics and our "particular - physical" make up. Our bodies produce by-products, like hormones, of our energy which may sustain love. I have read a lot about particle physics over the past few years and I think that the force that drives our bodies is the same energy that drives the rest of the universe; atomic energy, quarks, anti-quarks, mesons and neutrons.

At first I thought that love was an element, or a particle itself, like an atom or quark, but now I believe it is the unknowable energy that holds, binds, and releases particles.

People are alive because of their energy, their life force, and when these particles of energy are attracted to one another, you feel drawn to a person, you want to be near them, you interchange and exchange your energy, you are dynamically changed in the process just like any chemical reaction. "Our chemistry was fantastic" you will hear these recent lovebirds exclaim. "I couldn't stay away".

Just like any chemical reaction, the original matter is forever altered in the exchange of these particles of energy, the wood is still wood, but it has been burnt by the fire and it is carbonized. The water is still water, but because it had become steam, its distilled properties are ever slightly different than how it was before it boiled. You may be a better person, or far worse depending on what kind of particles (person) that love had bound you. You have been exposed and therefore altered.

Physics experts say that particles engage and disengage without rhyme or reason, it is an unpredictable cycle that can be hypothesized about but never locked down. It is the same with love. (and life and death, but not taxes) People become attracted, bump into each other, furiously their particles interchange and move, then release and fly off to form other interactions.

These exchanges could last years, hours or lifetimes. These exchanges also create other particle "bundles of joy"- children are a combined product of these biophysical and energetic reactions and exchanges. (the life part). And when your body is done, your energy dissipates, but is never destroyed. (the death-and everlasting life? re-incarnation? the karmic wheel?- part).

How does love know which energy to bind, it does this randomly? Perhaps. Purposefully? Perhaps. Who actually knows why or when love comes and why or when it leaves? This is the mystery and heartache and blessing of love. Those that are lucky enough to have it should not abuse it, those that want it desperately probably repel others energy, those who are contented, and not looking, experience love unexpectedly.

My friend Marty says "The best way to get over somebody is to get under somebody else" and he is probably right. Start a new exchange of particles and you will continue the reaction that your energy has grown accustomed to receiving. Your energy will feel less alone.