Everybody remembers their first time. Usually vividly. Intercourse ..ooooooh. So grown up. But what were your requirements? Some women set it up or wait for what they think is the perfect moment, prom night in a nice hotel with their first loves or the equivalent. Does that put too much pressure on the moment to deliver beyond what it really is? Yes, I understand the intimacy involved in the act of lovemaking, he sticks something of him inside of you (like Adam says... uhhh, it's only my rib Eve...relax...I won't tell anybody). It's a moment imbued with trust, for sure. For some, it just comes down to that decisive moment when they think they are being left behind by sexually active friends, or for others like me, the day they are drunk enough not to care, the "get it over with" attitude (one 40 ounce Bud was all it took, ahhh, youth).
For most women I have talked to, whatever road they took to get to hymen-free living, the thoughts after the act were...huh? that's it? We are told to expect big things from this moment, BLOOD! Tears of JOY. LIFelong LOVE! Immediate PRegnancy! The Pain of HELL. No one mentions the oozing sperm that will eventually soak your little undies and leave you feeling all day like your twat sneezed. Or the uncomfortable and awkward moments between even the best of friends and longest term boy/girlfriends after that certain edge has been gleaned. That intimate knowledge learned. Someone got something and someone relented and the power struggle begins.
Most women did not orgasm that first time, and even for years after they started having sex - this may be changing with the proliferation of sex toys, and ease of acquiring them over the internet- thank you internet!!!! So what was driving them to fuck if they weren't even getting off? The satisfaction of getting off their guy? Yes, that's a part of it. The feeling of appreciation from that guy? Now were getting warmer. The feeling of being loved and the affection that accompanies the act of lovemaking? Perhaps. Or is it the new found power that the woman now has over her pussy whipped boyfriend? So in giving it up, does she gain an advantage?
Some -like me- kept at it for practice. I knew that first time couldn't be IT, there had to be MORE. I thought, like a muscle, if I used it, it would grow. If I got used to it, something, that thing, would eventually happen.
I found that this attitude scared men. I wasn't in it for the babies, the relationship, the power, the commitment, I wanted to practice and get good at it. I was in it for the pleasure. That is intimidating to a guy who now has a much bigger responsibility -in his mind- to get me off. If it is all about the sexual act, and those moments only, they couldn't make it up to me later with a nice dinner, or any other scenarios that assuaged the other ladies. I suppose in looking back I was a pretty harsh judge, they were only learning as I was, but why did they talk such a huge game if they couldn't deliver?
Peacocking, bravado, a facet of the mating dance. In any case I did give them their chance to prove it. Little did I know that my orgasmic sexual satisfaction was up to me all along (can you hear me clicking my ruby red shoes together, "there's nothing like masturbation, nothing like masturbation"). And now all that masturbation has really paid off in sexual satisfaction with another human. Coming is exponential.
So basically, the boys had years of masturbation under their belts, and the girls were starting from scratch. Hopefully, the future holds more masturbating girls starting younger in life, who will reap those benefits and will enjoy sex more when the time comes to bust that cherry.
One last thought, do the women who plan the perfect de-virginalization night also become bridezillas?
Saturday, August 9, 2008
Sunday, July 20, 2008
A Vicious Cycle: Women's horniness killed by asshole behavior.
Guys wonder why they do not get enough sex in a relationship. The reason? Women are cut off at the pass by asshole behavior from their man. Women get cranky and need to be fucked, sometimes they don't even know how bad they need it, or as much or as often as they do. Woman are at their horniest and are maybe acting a little crazy from being pent up, a side effect of our busy lives of thinking about others, but right when we need it most, usually our guys do something that makes us so mad, that we don't want to fuck them at all! What an asshole! And nobody can work up the energy to fuck an asshole (and get off).
Is this an unconscious way that men withhold sex from their women? They complain that women don't want sex as often as men do, but that is just not true, women just can't suck and fuck someone they are mad at. Perhaps the nature of the standard act of intercourse allows men to fuck even if they hold a grudge. Who wouldn't want to pound on someone you were mad at? (and get off in the process, great!) But for women, getting fucked after you feel fucked over emotionally just... is not acceptable, literally.
Here's the advice, if your woman is acting cranky, and you know she needs it, instead of the lecture that your not getting enough downtown action, or grabbing her and humping her while she picks up the dirty laundry you left on the floor last week, or humping her during any other chore that is demanding her time at that moment, or yaking that your needs are not being met, (insert any other whiny, whiny man complaints about their sex life here) or even telling her she "just needs to be fucked" which is like saying "are you gonna go on the rag soon, you're a bitch!?" INSTEAD, think of the ways you can arouse her. Take a shower, maybe you can entice her into taking one with you by saying how you would love to scrub her (all over, not just her titties) with luscious soaps, or shampoo her hair as she relaxes, or whatever it takes to get her into the shower with you, dry her off, dry yourself off, and then do all the things you have been dreaming of. If you can't get her in the shower with you, take one by yourself, meet her with a clean body and start being very nice to her, arouse her, then she will be more than happy to fuck you. Buy some nice smelling lotion and massage her whole body. You may have to do this a few times without expecting sex after. This will lure her into relaxing and eventually, maybe the second or third time you are massaging her, she will fuck your brains out.
Did you notice the "arouse her" message? This is a major missing link for men. Women are focused on and distracted by the things they have to do in life -especially if they have kids, they are always thinking of what they have to do for the kids- and cannot just switch into fuck-me mode unless aroused (or driven into fuck-me mode by time and pent up sex drive energy that has not been released -see above- but by that time she is already very crazy!). Sometimes, you can't just lift her skirt and start chomping, she may need a little more warm up, BUT sometimes that's ALL it takes, a random act of cunnilingus and a nice finger-blasting that does not need to be immediately reciprocated with a blow job does wonders for a girl's heart and mind.
You won't even have to think about arousing her so much if you are not an asshole! She will be more apt and ready to screw you if you are doing things that make you appear to be a good guy in her eyes. Remember, sex is habitual, the more they do it, the more regularly women will want to do it. Think about it. They need it as much as you. They want it as much as you. They also want you to be fuckable. So, be a good guy, and she will screw you more often.
Is this an unconscious way that men withhold sex from their women? They complain that women don't want sex as often as men do, but that is just not true, women just can't suck and fuck someone they are mad at. Perhaps the nature of the standard act of intercourse allows men to fuck even if they hold a grudge. Who wouldn't want to pound on someone you were mad at? (and get off in the process, great!) But for women, getting fucked after you feel fucked over emotionally just... is not acceptable, literally.
Here's the advice, if your woman is acting cranky, and you know she needs it, instead of the lecture that your not getting enough downtown action, or grabbing her and humping her while she picks up the dirty laundry you left on the floor last week, or humping her during any other chore that is demanding her time at that moment, or yaking that your needs are not being met, (insert any other whiny, whiny man complaints about their sex life here) or even telling her she "just needs to be fucked" which is like saying "are you gonna go on the rag soon, you're a bitch!?" INSTEAD, think of the ways you can arouse her. Take a shower, maybe you can entice her into taking one with you by saying how you would love to scrub her (all over, not just her titties) with luscious soaps, or shampoo her hair as she relaxes, or whatever it takes to get her into the shower with you, dry her off, dry yourself off, and then do all the things you have been dreaming of. If you can't get her in the shower with you, take one by yourself, meet her with a clean body and start being very nice to her, arouse her, then she will be more than happy to fuck you. Buy some nice smelling lotion and massage her whole body. You may have to do this a few times without expecting sex after. This will lure her into relaxing and eventually, maybe the second or third time you are massaging her, she will fuck your brains out.
Did you notice the "arouse her" message? This is a major missing link for men. Women are focused on and distracted by the things they have to do in life -especially if they have kids, they are always thinking of what they have to do for the kids- and cannot just switch into fuck-me mode unless aroused (or driven into fuck-me mode by time and pent up sex drive energy that has not been released -see above- but by that time she is already very crazy!). Sometimes, you can't just lift her skirt and start chomping, she may need a little more warm up, BUT sometimes that's ALL it takes, a random act of cunnilingus and a nice finger-blasting that does not need to be immediately reciprocated with a blow job does wonders for a girl's heart and mind.
You won't even have to think about arousing her so much if you are not an asshole! She will be more apt and ready to screw you if you are doing things that make you appear to be a good guy in her eyes. Remember, sex is habitual, the more they do it, the more regularly women will want to do it. Think about it. They need it as much as you. They want it as much as you. They also want you to be fuckable. So, be a good guy, and she will screw you more often.
Friday, July 18, 2008
Jane'e Guide review of Smutty Intelligence
I've been given a "quality" rating from Jane's Guide and I didn't even sleep with anybody!
I had a lot of fun reading Karen's blog. It is a wonderful collection of insights into sexuality written by a confident woman over thirty. Here is one of my favorite quotes from her work, "Well, some ladies are a little shy about 'masturbating' themselves in front of a new guy. I might be a little harsh but I think this kind of shy is ridiculous. Ladies, you are letting them stick their penis in you but are too shy to get yourself off in the process? Shy and demure behavior is not for the bedroom, it's for when you meet his parents, or children, or boss." I could not have said it better myself. Karen has a wonderfully brazen tone throughout her writing, and I love it. - Vamp
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Monday, July 14, 2008
Hurray for Mirena!
Today I got my IUD inserted. This morning, just a few hours ago, and I feel great. A little cramping upon insertion, but I rode my bike home afterward and feel totally normal and fine.
Now I have 5 years of the best birth control money can buy and a lot less to worry about. They say my periods will regulate over the next year and could stop altogether (hopefully). I always liked getting my period, because the alternative was too horrible to think about. It was a reassuring pain in the ass. At least I knew I was NOT pregnant if I was on the rag. Now I will have to trust my little R2D2 friend, the vaginal squid that battles sperm and all it's potential.
I have a feeling that I won't miss Aunt Flo's visits from Redbank too much.
Many monogamous women I know are choosing this IUD option for birth control. Some non-monogamous women I know have it too and I wonder if it is very very tempting not to use condoms, or is the fear of disease enough to motivate condom use? It will be for me. For now -at this moment, week, month?? I am monogamous, and if I choose to bang a new man, I'm definatly wrapping that sausage.
Now I have 5 years of the best birth control money can buy and a lot less to worry about. They say my periods will regulate over the next year and could stop altogether (hopefully). I always liked getting my period, because the alternative was too horrible to think about. It was a reassuring pain in the ass. At least I knew I was NOT pregnant if I was on the rag. Now I will have to trust my little R2D2 friend, the vaginal squid that battles sperm and all it's potential.
I have a feeling that I won't miss Aunt Flo's visits from Redbank too much.
Many monogamous women I know are choosing this IUD option for birth control. Some non-monogamous women I know have it too and I wonder if it is very very tempting not to use condoms, or is the fear of disease enough to motivate condom use? It will be for me. For now -at this moment, week, month?? I am monogamous, and if I choose to bang a new man, I'm definatly wrapping that sausage.
Wednesday, June 11, 2008
Horny, horny women and their sexual peak, part two
The "horny horny women and their sexual peak" post was quite popular. Apparently, this phenomena is just another of women's sexual experiences that we as a society consider a dirty little secret. I guess it's what made Mrs. Robinson from "the Graduate" such a controversial figure? Here are some comments I received, would love to hear how anyone would reply to the last fellow who is grappling with his wife's horny nature.
anonymous #1
Thanks for this post. I am realizing now that I've hit my sexual peak, even though my boyfriend tells me that it's at age 40. I just turned 30. I have suddenly had the urge to literally fuck all of my male co-workers. I'm glad I'm not alone in all of this.
I've been fucking my boyfriend 3 times a day and feel this great urge to make a baby. I will be reading your journal more often.
The thing that strikes me about this comment is that her lucky boyfriend is getting it 3 times a day and still has the balls to say she isn't hitting some kind of sexual peak? Perhaps she hasn't peaked, I understand, things could get wilder, better, she'll get more confident, she is just starting this phase, but that she feels something and he denies it makes my hackles go up. Maybe -in addition to the hormonal surge- she wants to fuck her co-workers because they respect her? Okay, perhaps that isn't the case, he may be simply ignorant, like the rest of the world, about this and maybe wants to let her know that it's just going to get BETTER! I would definitely say this falls under the fertile/baby making category. Listen Honey, don't get fooled by your body into motherhood if you don't want it, or are not ready, a child is yours FOREVER. But have fun with your horniness. I think it makes a woman feel beautiful, charismatic, and sexy.
Oh, and by the way, I was reminded of a moment in my life the other day and it occurred to me that it was probably the onset of my "sexual peak" phase. I was 30, yes 30 like the woman above, walking down 14th street in Manhattan, thinking about a guy I knew from Europe; I had just moved back to NYC. I was just thinking of what he would be doing that time of day, drinking tea, or whatever. It was not even a sexually charged fantasy when my nipples got HARD, both of them, and as they rubbed against my shirt I had a full-body-sensation-orgasm walking down the street. It was as if I was not even in control of this body. It took me by surprise (a pleasant surprise) and I have never been able to recreate that moment. (yes, I've tried). So, I think 30 might be some official start, like adolescence may start physically changing girls at 10, but for some not until 12 or 14, or even 16, right? Next comment.
anonymous #2
Just found this site when I was searching the web for "women's sexual peak." I am almost 44 yrs old and ever since I turned 40, I have been horny all the time. I was horny in my late teens-20's, basically almost 0 in my 30s, and now, WOW! And it seems to be getting more intense. I masturbate almost daily since my lover is in another state. I have been trying really hard not to place an ad online looking for a FWB situation. I see men on the street and want to do it right there with them. Thank goodness for some wonderful toys I have been experimenting with. Too bad they don't come with warm bodies.
-she continues-
I'm not so sure that the sexual peak has anything to do with my biological clock. My "child" is 21yrs old and I'm 44. I've always been sexual, having started sex as a young teen. I've always had a good sexual life and always enjoyed it. I've had great partners. But about 2 yrs ago, I noticed, and in fact, I think my partner noticed before I did--that I wanted and NEEDED sex more often. It has since intensified and all I want to do is get off. I want to fuck everybody--men and women, all day and night. I think about it all the time, no matter what I'm doing. I have no intentions of having or feelings for wanting another child at all--instead, I feel liberated that my kid is an adult right now.
I love this post. The woman is also taking it into her own hands (or toys) which I love. For me, just the fantasy of a warm body is enough sometimes, who needs the actual person? Also, I am ignorant of these abbreviations...what is a FWB situation? Let me know...
The mistake is that she thinks the horniness is some kind of desire, conscious or otherwise, to have kids when I simply refer to the ovulation process being amped. I have no desire for children either, but am still horny horny horny. I actually think it is a cruel twist for us ladies who love the freedom of unmotherhood, that we are so horny at a time when it is so easy for us to conceive. As far as her not feeling horny in her 30's, I have heard that having kids, and their related baggage, ie. responsibility (work more to make money to provide), care taking (bathe feed and clothe the little one), affection (they love you and crawl all over you, drooling, crying, laughing, jumping, enough physically activity to satisfy any affection level) care giving (you love them, hold them, bandage wounds, develop their lives, pick out schools, take them to music lessons, etc.) these parental duties really have a way of taking the focus off of oneself and depositing it onto the child. This woman was around 23 when she had a child, so the bulk of rearing the kid happened in her 30's. She may have been pumping out the best fertile eggs during those years, but fatigue of child rearing and focusing on a little one's life could have acted as an antidote to horniness. Once she felt she was done, "liberated" that is, her child is 21 and all grown up, her horniness flourished! hurray!! !! seems normal and natural to me.
anonymous #3
Thanks for the honesty ladies. Has this urge subsided any? Seems my wife is/was going through this. It started when she was around 30 and now she's 36 how much longer will she have this urge? BTW, I understand when you see someone attractive, you might take a double look, but as you ladies say you want to screw just about every guy you see. Also, any tips to fulfill her fantasies while in this sexual peak would be greatly appreciated. FYI, we've always been a sexually charged couple and I don't consider are sex life "dull".
Well, the urge has not subsided for me. And as you can read above, the woman who is 44 is just starting to feel this (well, at 40 years she started to feel it), so I think you are perhaps in for a longer haul than a short horny ride.
First:
Get her good sex toys and give her plenty of privacy to use them. (see earlier posts regarding good vibes) She can take the edge off by masturbating and fantasizing about who she wants to fuck. DAILY. She should do this in addition to screwing you.
Second:
Do it whenever and wherever. Be ready if you need condoms for protection, and go at it in different places, at different times. Sometimes just service her orally or manually (see fingerblasting post, or cunnilingus post)
Third:
If you don't already, then use vibrators in your sex acts to enhance her pleasure. The "hitachi magic wand" on the clit IS magic during intercourse, and as some women have confided, they don't get off in the same way without it.
Fourth:
Consider a threesome. Maybe screwing one of the guys she wants to, and you at the same time, will also calm the beast. Or maybe like the lady above, her horniness extends to an interest in ladies? I can understand how that may not appeal if you are married and want to keep the sexual relationship private, but a suggestion nonetheless. Perhaps you know a friendly couple looking for a switch-a-roo and then you all win.
Fifth:
Alter your appearance if possible. Grow your hair, cut your hair, grow a beard, shave your beard. Your chameleon like ways will fuel her "I am with the Xerox repairman tonight" fantasy and may make you more dynamic to her as you are not the same old guy, night after night.
Sixth:
Change your sexual pattern. If you are finding that you do it in the same way all the time, like a "by the bases" foreplay scenario- kiss kiss, squeeze a boobie, rub the twat, stick it in- you may want to mix it up.
Seventh:
Maybe this should have been the first suggestion, but have an honest discussion about her orgasmic ways. Is she getting off when she is with you? What could you do to facilitate this? Leggo your ego, if you know what I mean. Even if she's been faking for ten years, better to find out and change your ways then lose someone you love.
anonymous #1
Thanks for this post. I am realizing now that I've hit my sexual peak, even though my boyfriend tells me that it's at age 40. I just turned 30. I have suddenly had the urge to literally fuck all of my male co-workers. I'm glad I'm not alone in all of this.
I've been fucking my boyfriend 3 times a day and feel this great urge to make a baby. I will be reading your journal more often.
The thing that strikes me about this comment is that her lucky boyfriend is getting it 3 times a day and still has the balls to say she isn't hitting some kind of sexual peak? Perhaps she hasn't peaked, I understand, things could get wilder, better, she'll get more confident, she is just starting this phase, but that she feels something and he denies it makes my hackles go up. Maybe -in addition to the hormonal surge- she wants to fuck her co-workers because they respect her? Okay, perhaps that isn't the case, he may be simply ignorant, like the rest of the world, about this and maybe wants to let her know that it's just going to get BETTER! I would definitely say this falls under the fertile/baby making category. Listen Honey, don't get fooled by your body into motherhood if you don't want it, or are not ready, a child is yours FOREVER. But have fun with your horniness. I think it makes a woman feel beautiful, charismatic, and sexy.
Oh, and by the way, I was reminded of a moment in my life the other day and it occurred to me that it was probably the onset of my "sexual peak" phase. I was 30, yes 30 like the woman above, walking down 14th street in Manhattan, thinking about a guy I knew from Europe; I had just moved back to NYC. I was just thinking of what he would be doing that time of day, drinking tea, or whatever. It was not even a sexually charged fantasy when my nipples got HARD, both of them, and as they rubbed against my shirt I had a full-body-sensation-orgasm walking down the street. It was as if I was not even in control of this body. It took me by surprise (a pleasant surprise) and I have never been able to recreate that moment. (yes, I've tried). So, I think 30 might be some official start, like adolescence may start physically changing girls at 10, but for some not until 12 or 14, or even 16, right? Next comment.
anonymous #2
Just found this site when I was searching the web for "women's sexual peak." I am almost 44 yrs old and ever since I turned 40, I have been horny all the time. I was horny in my late teens-20's, basically almost 0 in my 30s, and now, WOW! And it seems to be getting more intense. I masturbate almost daily since my lover is in another state. I have been trying really hard not to place an ad online looking for a FWB situation. I see men on the street and want to do it right there with them. Thank goodness for some wonderful toys I have been experimenting with. Too bad they don't come with warm bodies.
-she continues-
I'm not so sure that the sexual peak has anything to do with my biological clock. My "child" is 21yrs old and I'm 44. I've always been sexual, having started sex as a young teen. I've always had a good sexual life and always enjoyed it. I've had great partners. But about 2 yrs ago, I noticed, and in fact, I think my partner noticed before I did--that I wanted and NEEDED sex more often. It has since intensified and all I want to do is get off. I want to fuck everybody--men and women, all day and night. I think about it all the time, no matter what I'm doing. I have no intentions of having or feelings for wanting another child at all--instead, I feel liberated that my kid is an adult right now.
I love this post. The woman is also taking it into her own hands (or toys) which I love. For me, just the fantasy of a warm body is enough sometimes, who needs the actual person? Also, I am ignorant of these abbreviations...what is a FWB situation? Let me know...
The mistake is that she thinks the horniness is some kind of desire, conscious or otherwise, to have kids when I simply refer to the ovulation process being amped. I have no desire for children either, but am still horny horny horny. I actually think it is a cruel twist for us ladies who love the freedom of unmotherhood, that we are so horny at a time when it is so easy for us to conceive. As far as her not feeling horny in her 30's, I have heard that having kids, and their related baggage, ie. responsibility (work more to make money to provide), care taking (bathe feed and clothe the little one), affection (they love you and crawl all over you, drooling, crying, laughing, jumping, enough physically activity to satisfy any affection level) care giving (you love them, hold them, bandage wounds, develop their lives, pick out schools, take them to music lessons, etc.) these parental duties really have a way of taking the focus off of oneself and depositing it onto the child. This woman was around 23 when she had a child, so the bulk of rearing the kid happened in her 30's. She may have been pumping out the best fertile eggs during those years, but fatigue of child rearing and focusing on a little one's life could have acted as an antidote to horniness. Once she felt she was done, "liberated" that is, her child is 21 and all grown up, her horniness flourished! hurray!! !! seems normal and natural to me.
anonymous #3
Thanks for the honesty ladies. Has this urge subsided any? Seems my wife is/was going through this. It started when she was around 30 and now she's 36 how much longer will she have this urge? BTW, I understand when you see someone attractive, you might take a double look, but as you ladies say you want to screw just about every guy you see. Also, any tips to fulfill her fantasies while in this sexual peak would be greatly appreciated. FYI, we've always been a sexually charged couple and I don't consider are sex life "dull".
Well, the urge has not subsided for me. And as you can read above, the woman who is 44 is just starting to feel this (well, at 40 years she started to feel it), so I think you are perhaps in for a longer haul than a short horny ride.
First:
Get her good sex toys and give her plenty of privacy to use them. (see earlier posts regarding good vibes) She can take the edge off by masturbating and fantasizing about who she wants to fuck. DAILY. She should do this in addition to screwing you.
Second:
Do it whenever and wherever. Be ready if you need condoms for protection, and go at it in different places, at different times. Sometimes just service her orally or manually (see fingerblasting post, or cunnilingus post)
Third:
If you don't already, then use vibrators in your sex acts to enhance her pleasure. The "hitachi magic wand" on the clit IS magic during intercourse, and as some women have confided, they don't get off in the same way without it.
Fourth:
Consider a threesome. Maybe screwing one of the guys she wants to, and you at the same time, will also calm the beast. Or maybe like the lady above, her horniness extends to an interest in ladies? I can understand how that may not appeal if you are married and want to keep the sexual relationship private, but a suggestion nonetheless. Perhaps you know a friendly couple looking for a switch-a-roo and then you all win.
Fifth:
Alter your appearance if possible. Grow your hair, cut your hair, grow a beard, shave your beard. Your chameleon like ways will fuel her "I am with the Xerox repairman tonight" fantasy and may make you more dynamic to her as you are not the same old guy, night after night.
Sixth:
Change your sexual pattern. If you are finding that you do it in the same way all the time, like a "by the bases" foreplay scenario- kiss kiss, squeeze a boobie, rub the twat, stick it in- you may want to mix it up.
Seventh:
Maybe this should have been the first suggestion, but have an honest discussion about her orgasmic ways. Is she getting off when she is with you? What could you do to facilitate this? Leggo your ego, if you know what I mean. Even if she's been faking for ten years, better to find out and change your ways then lose someone you love.
Thursday, June 5, 2008
a revealing story....
A friend sent this story to me.....
A professor at University of Minnesota was giving a lecture
on 'Involuntary Muscular Contractions' to his first year medical
students.
Realizing this was not the most riveting subject, the professor decided
to lighten the mood slightly.
He pointed to a young woman in the front row and said, 'Do you
know what your asshole is doing while you're having an orgasm?'
She replied, 'Probably deer hunting with his buddies.'
The professor laughed so hard he could not continue with the class.
A professor at University of Minnesota was giving a lecture
on 'Involuntary Muscular Contractions' to his first year medical
students.
Realizing this was not the most riveting subject, the professor decided
to lighten the mood slightly.
He pointed to a young woman in the front row and said, 'Do you
know what your asshole is doing while you're having an orgasm?'
She replied, 'Probably deer hunting with his buddies.'
The professor laughed so hard he could not continue with the class.
Monday, May 26, 2008
push and pull
Is sex just about domination and submission on varying levels? Each person in the act takes one of these roles in either a dynamic or subtle way. Is there any way to separate the act from the feeling of taking and being taken? Is that part of the orgasmic release? The surrender to the "little death" is submitting to the control of the other person and therefore brings on the release of orgasm, or controlling the other person and demanding surrender brings on the release for the initiator? Every time and in every moment during sex the roles switch according to mood and moment, but is this element ever absent?
Because one is penetrating and one is being penetrated automatically sets up a dynamic that indicates power. In all sex acts there is some form of penetration, I cannot think of one act that does not involve a probing or a sucking indicating penetration. Even nipple sucking! The tit is in the mouth, penetrating. I wonder how many times I can think about penetration before I get off myself?
I used to ask people what their favorite sexual position was in order to get a glimpse of their personality. If they liked it missionary, on top, from behind, standing.... I always found that this was a good way to break the ice and learn something about another person without asking typical questions like their astrological sign or the mundane details of their lives. It's also a nice way to see if they fit with how your domination/submission feeling is at the moment. If you are feeling like a cowgirl who wants to pony up and ride that bronco top style, you don't want the man who answers, "doggie style, every time, baby".
Because one is penetrating and one is being penetrated automatically sets up a dynamic that indicates power. In all sex acts there is some form of penetration, I cannot think of one act that does not involve a probing or a sucking indicating penetration. Even nipple sucking! The tit is in the mouth, penetrating. I wonder how many times I can think about penetration before I get off myself?
I used to ask people what their favorite sexual position was in order to get a glimpse of their personality. If they liked it missionary, on top, from behind, standing.... I always found that this was a good way to break the ice and learn something about another person without asking typical questions like their astrological sign or the mundane details of their lives. It's also a nice way to see if they fit with how your domination/submission feeling is at the moment. If you are feeling like a cowgirl who wants to pony up and ride that bronco top style, you don't want the man who answers, "doggie style, every time, baby".
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