Yes, I specifically used that goofy word, lovemaking, because you need a little bit of something, something more than robotic physical responses, for an all-time-blue ribbon-five star session of fucking. Animal lust, yes! And maybe a little compassion for the human you are with, or empathy, it doesn't have to be love, but respect for them as a person who is being generous with their body and letting you share in the ultimate physical act of human pleasure.
Most of the time, porn guys don't really act like they have much compassion or empathy for the ladies they are fucking. Especially in the "Real College Girls" series put out by Penthouse. Jeez, these girls withstand a lot of shit for whatever dough they are making. Ugly guys! Ugly guys talking dirty and saying, what I would consider, mean things to their "college whores". It's kind of a turn off for me. I usually start hating the guys and wondering why the girl(s) is still doing it with them, then I remember that she signed a contract.
I once had a guy tap, slap, whap, I really don't know the term, but he tapped his dick -twice- on my pussy after he came. Like, tapping the ash off a cigarette, sorry, cigar? Like a "thank you" slap on the vulva? I have seen this in porn and usually the girl is like "oooh ! ha ha, yeeah". I was like, "youch, my orgasm sensitive clit does not need to be slapped with your still-hard-but-becoming-flaccid- enough-to-be-a-whip cock. His reply to my non-verbal reaction? "Oh, that's no good, huh? ok." Which makes me wonder, what impulse was that? Where did he get the idea that a nice post-coital dick whap makes a girl's day?
And then, there is the ass slapping. I am not against a rowdy round of bounce-off-the-walls fucking. I am pro-rowdy rounds, let me tell you. I love to experience all sorts of athletically challenging positions and am not against a little physicality. But there is a time and place for ass slapping, and a delivery method that is believable and tolerable.
Don't slap me like I'm a horse that you are encouraging to run away because a posse is chasing you. That will just piss me off, because it will hurt, and hurt -to me- is anti-pleasure. For some women, hurt is pleasurable, they like to be hurt. Discuss this during a pre-sexual contact conversation so you know the limits. Also, when you slap ass, don't say "slap that ass!" It sounds like porn dialogue. It snaps me out of the fun moment of fucking to think, "jeez, what does this guy think, he's the star of his own show? Does he even remember that I'm here, or am I just another piece of ass?"
I may be just another piece of ass, and that's fine, when it's mutual and understood. But, if you ever want access again, please remember and refer to the illusion you painted to get me in the sack. It should be maintained to a degree that allows both participants to fully enjoy the sexual experience. If I jumped in bed with you because you said you fucked like a porn star, then okay, I deserve whatever porno tricks you can muster, but if I am screwing you because we had a good conversation and fantastic chemistry, then let's have at it, and try our best to have the most fun possible.
You can even slap my ass-if you grab that cheek with your open palm upon impact, massage the freshly slapped area like you give a shit, yelling "goddamn you have an unbelievable ASS!".
See, how easy it is to be compassionate?