Everybody remembers their first time. Usually vividly. Intercourse ..ooooooh. So grown up. But what were your requirements? Some women set it up or wait for what they think is the perfect moment, prom night in a nice hotel with their first loves or the equivalent. Does that put too much pressure on the moment to deliver beyond what it really is? Yes, I understand the intimacy involved in the act of lovemaking, he sticks something of him inside of you (like Adam says... uhhh, it's only my rib Eve...relax...I won't tell anybody). It's a moment imbued with trust, for sure. For some, it just comes down to that decisive moment when they think they are being left behind by sexually active friends, or for others like me, the day they are drunk enough not to care, the "get it over with" attitude (one 40 ounce Bud was all it took, ahhh, youth).
For most women I have talked to, whatever road they took to get to hymen-free living, the thoughts after the act were...huh? that's it? We are told to expect big things from this moment, BLOOD! Tears of JOY. LIFelong LOVE! Immediate PRegnancy! The Pain of HELL. No one mentions the oozing sperm that will eventually soak your little undies and leave you feeling all day like your twat sneezed. Or the uncomfortable and awkward moments between even the best of friends and longest term boy/girlfriends after that certain edge has been gleaned. That intimate knowledge learned. Someone got something and someone relented and the power struggle begins.
Most women did not orgasm that first time, and even for years after they started having sex - this may be changing with the proliferation of sex toys, and ease of acquiring them over the internet- thank you internet!!!! So what was driving them to fuck if they weren't even getting off? The satisfaction of getting off their guy? Yes, that's a part of it. The feeling of appreciation from that guy? Now were getting warmer. The feeling of being loved and the affection that accompanies the act of lovemaking? Perhaps. Or is it the new found power that the woman now has over her pussy whipped boyfriend? So in giving it up, does she gain an advantage?
Some -like me- kept at it for practice. I knew that first time couldn't be IT, there had to be MORE. I thought, like a muscle, if I used it, it would grow. If I got used to it, something, that thing, would eventually happen.
I found that this attitude scared men. I wasn't in it for the babies, the relationship, the power, the commitment, I wanted to practice and get good at it. I was in it for the pleasure. That is intimidating to a guy who now has a much bigger responsibility -in his mind- to get me off. If it is all about the sexual act, and those moments only, they couldn't make it up to me later with a nice dinner, or any other scenarios that assuaged the other ladies. I suppose in looking back I was a pretty harsh judge, they were only learning as I was, but why did they talk such a huge game if they couldn't deliver?
Peacocking, bravado, a facet of the mating dance. In any case I did give them their chance to prove it. Little did I know that my orgasmic sexual satisfaction was up to me all along (can you hear me clicking my ruby red shoes together, "there's nothing like masturbation, nothing like masturbation"). And now all that masturbation has really paid off in sexual satisfaction with another human. Coming is exponential.
So basically, the boys had years of masturbation under their belts, and the girls were starting from scratch. Hopefully, the future holds more masturbating girls starting younger in life, who will reap those benefits and will enjoy sex more when the time comes to bust that cherry.
One last thought, do the women who plan the perfect de-virginalization night also become bridezillas?