Tuesday, October 9, 2007

Female Ejaculation

I have been thinking a lot about female ejaculation lately. I've actually been thinking about it for a long time. Way, way back when I was 21 I wrote this song called "(I never need a john when I'm) Feeling On and part of the lyrics read, "i can't ejaculate but honey I can cream" (it goes on)..."i don't make no excuse / it ain't like what it seems / cause i never need a john when i'm 'Feeling On'". Then I started thinking, "... I do ejaculate, but I can't write that because everyone will know my dirty little secret". So, I had to ask myself, what was that thing that was going on ...if girls were not supposed to do that?

Recently, I began researching this phenomena. I started because I was freaked out by the amount I was producing, a little used to be okay but what was this bursting? I think that for myself...I really wanted to know if it was piss. I was a little put off by thinking that I was pissing everywhere. Is it better that I know now that it isn't piss? That it is a big puddle of "something else"? (same stuff found in a prostate, plus other fluids) YES, but Not Really because it wasn't like I was going to stop doing it, stop feeling it, even if it was piss. Never the less, it's a hot and messy scene regardless of the ingredients . And anyway, I just had to know.

I conducted amateur research starting in Portland OR, 1995. It all began with an angled, weird, square vibe. A shoulder massager that came with with hard flat plastic nubbin snap on/off surface (several to choose from!). It was square, did I mention this? I think it merits reminding. It was supposed to be used for shoulders and neck. You'd hang it on your shoulder and apply pressure by pulling down. I bought it from a door-to-door salesman one day at work. I was working at the time in a sex toy shop, I could have had any vibe in town, but this one had power. Plus, I discovered, what pulls down must pull up and I inadvertently discovered the phenomena of female ejaculation. When I used that thing in the only way I could, because the angle was so acute, it pin pointed my gush button.

Female Prostate, G-Spot, Skene Glands, Clitoris.

Had I found the female prostate from the outside or was it just hugging the base of the clit that produced this reaction? Stimulating it with a press and lift most always led to some sort of gushing. This I discovered was a precursor orgasm to a mind blowing clit, vag, and anal orgasm. All my parts would contract. For some time...then continue for a few minutes, like surprises shudders. The residual spasms reminded me of when a horse itches, how it looks as it shakes its skin. Startling almost. I started counting them, then I stopped counting.

So, the ejaculation was not the end of the show. As it is for men, there was perhaps a refractory period that "reset" the clock of vaginal orgasm, but I didn't have to stop, it was like an event on this masturbation time line. Sometimes the gush was enough of an orgasm for that session and that would be that. Just for health. It was then that I started to believe that this ejaculation reduced pre-menstrual symptoms such as bloating.

It seemed if I didn't "express" myself, the orgasms were a lot more focused specifically in one zone, clit or vag. They were still good, but not the motherlode. Also, I found during sex, if the cock (or the dildo/vibe) didn't get shot out or squeezed out by the force of these experiences, I could feel bloated and pained, like something physical is being kept in. And if you hold it in, it's not like it's still there waiting for the moment of freedom, like the levee breaks and the river runs it's banks, the event happens and either you let it out in that moment, or it goes away, sometimes painfully. So, I would either shift positions, or keep going for a while to see what will happen, and eventually the pain would go away and the feeling would change as it does during any sexual session. Did it just seep out around the cock or is the pain is related to not having the freedom of a good flush? Was it re-absorbed, re-directed?

They say the female prostate is a bundle of nervy like strands (I picture them like marbling in meat) that surround the urethra and run towards the base of the clit and can be stimulated by pressure in the vagina if you push up to the front side of that luscious tube. Where the G-spot is said to reside. Thus, the confusion for the experts. In my experience I think the female prostate area is best stimulated by a vibrator pulling and held, pushing and held, against the base of the clit from the front side. That first vibe, the weird one, was the best at getting the perfect angle and pull position. Happily, I burned out the motor on that vibe and threw it out. That is why I love the Hitachi Magic Wand. It makes up in power and speed for what it lacks in straight edges, angles and torque. The angled one had the added benefit of being adjusted to pop onto clit duty when a change or reset was needed. The magic wand is like that too, mobile, versatile, but less specific.

Or was that vibrator angle just stimulating the Skene glands? The Skene glands, I think could possibly play their own part too, but the proof is sketchy. Is it the same as the prostate, what do Skene glands do?

Wikipedia entry on the skene glands: the Skene's glands (also known as the lesser vestibular, periurethral glands, or paraurethral glands[1]) are glands located on the upper wall of the vagina, around the lower end of the urethra. They drain into the urethra and near the urethral opening. These glands are surrounded by tissue, which includes the part of the clitoris that reaches up inside the vagina and swells with blood during sexual arousal. There is some evidence that nerves in the area produce an orgasm different to one produced by clitoral stimulation.[citation needed]

Citation needed is RIGHT! I feel like they are related somehow to the expulsion because they direct fluid into the urethra and then it is passed out. But my experience sometimes feels a little different, like the skene glands themselves release the fluid, sometimes through the urethra, sometimes it feels like it is being carried out of the glands themselves, a feeling that it comes more from the vagina than urethra.

I think the G-spot is another bundle of nerves that contributes to the mindblower trifecta orgasm experience, maybe even connecting the two parts, the vaginal canal and clit. Maybe it's like the sensitive spot at the underside of a guys head, it contributes as a bundle of nerves does to sensation, but is not wholly responsible for a particular type of orgasm. Maybe it is the underside of the Skene glands or another side of the prostate and when stimulated from the inside gives a different sensation. Anybody out there have any ideas, opinions?

My impression is that these glands are like nerves that secrete fluid and send electronic messages to each other. If you have a vibe on your clit, dipping into the prostate, a vibe in your sheath, pressing up to your g-spot, love in your heart and smutty thoughts, you should come like a fountain.

If you don't, so what? Try again and don't sweat it.

Future subjects: Kegel Anecdotes

2 comments:

  1. In "The Story of V: A Natural History of Female Sexuality", Catherine Blackledge proposes that the female prostate is a lot bigger, spongier, and more spread out than the male prostate (kinda like the penis is bigger, spongier and more spread out than the clitoris). She suggests that all the *name* glands are sections of the female prostate that over-zealous anatomists named after themselves, when in reality it's just one big glad, and that the "G spot" is the part of the female prostate we can feel through the vaginal wall (like feeling the male prostate through the rectal wall).

    Have you ever experienced/heard of women ejaculating during sexual excitement but not during (or even really near) orgasm? I know it's cliche, but I'm really worried that I'm peeing. (This is especially frustrating during cunnilingus.)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Yes, definitely women ejaculate during sexual excitement. I refer to this as an orgasm (small) even if you don't feel the whole spastic (big) orgasm feeling. If all goes right, it is usually followed by the bigger one, much like a "pre-cum" situation in the male; a little cum sneaks out of the penis during excitation. (good good good, good vibrations...sorry just had to say that after excitation! Yay, Beach Boys!) But the male wouldn't necessarily think or feel the same feeling as if he came, or would he call pre-cum leakage an "orgasm". Don't be frustrated if this happens during cunnilingus, just maybe warn the person you are with that if they don't want you to come in their mouth, or on their face, that you will pull them off/push them away or give some warning at the right moment. Some like to drink in the whole experience and wouldn't mind at all your reaction to their mad "downtown lady" skills. You could come this way first then have a different orgasm later - or shoot during the excitement phase, AND during your spastic orgasm. I have found this amount varies not only from woman to woman but also changes due to hormone levels, hydration levels, and other factors too numerable to mention. Thanks for the comment, keep 'em coming!

    ReplyDelete